adjustments

As any man who has made it through puberty can attest to, there are certain times when your nether-regions need adjusting because things just aren't hangin' right.

Last night I was in my boss' garage, working on putting new saddlebags on my motorcycle. It was a nice evening, the sun was setting, the breeze was blowing gently, and my "boys" needed to be shuffled around so that they could enjoy the experience.

In the process of my adjusting, the school counselor (aka the boss' wife) comes out to put her trash in the bin, which is right in front of her garage. The same garage that I am working in, the same garage that has the door wide open as so I can enjoy the evening, the same garage that I am adjusting myself in.

So there I am, balls in my right hand, a shit-eating grin on my face, and my boss' wife spinning around to avoid the sight that she has just seen. She covers her eyes and tries to think of something whitty to say as a cover.

"Ohhh! You surprised me! I thought you were someone breaking into the garage and trying to steal your motorcycle!"

Yup, that's what most people do when they are trying to steal a motorcycle - they grab their balls.

I merely pulled my hand out of my pants, put it down into the pocket and pulled out the ratchet that was in my pocket. I calmly turned to the embarrased wife and said, "Nah, just looking for my wrench."



Life goes on.
My balls are fine.
My boss' wife appears to be ok and not permanently scarred.
The saddlebags aren't on my bike yet but I'll get them on this weekend.
And you can't make shit like this up.

and in with another

The new addition to the family. Since I haven't had the chance to take it for a ride to fancy places like the Erasmus Bridge, this will have to do for now. Click on pic for enlarged view.

gone with one

Here's the Triumph in front by the Erasmusbrug here in Rotterdam (taken near Hotel New York). It was a nice change of pace, but not my style of motorcycle.

not triumph-ant

Well, the deed is done and the Triumph is no more. I took the 93 Sprint Trident 900 back to my local dealer and let him have it. I am just not a sport-touring kinda guy. I enjoyed the freedom the bike gave me for the time that I had it but I just didn't feel comfortable on it. What can I say, I like cruisers. And besides, if you don't feel comfortable on a motorcycle, you'll probably crash.

So guess what I spied? A Kawasaki VN1500. That's right, a big thumpin' V-twin that reminds me of the bike that is currently sitting in storage in Ohio. I told my dealer that I wanted it and within 30 minutes, it was mine. I picked it up Friday and have been cruisin' around since. I did take a few hours off to watch Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith and to chat with my friend Shamash; I can't spend every waking moment riding around (your butt tends to hurt if you do that).

Pictures to follow later in the week. And while I know that the majority of my readers could give a 'la-de-dah' about it, those who ride understand how ya feel when you get a new bike (new to you if nothing else). So comment if you like but I'm really not expecting it. I just wanted to share the news.

If you'll excuse me, I have a date with a twisty road to attend to...

aunt rita is in da house

I remember my parents when I was growing up as people who were carefree and seemed to party every weekend - at least for the two years that we lived in Mexico. As an 11 year old, there is something quite funny about your father cleaning up a spilled drink with a mop and then after making his final sweep with the mop, a rocketing throw of said cleaning device into the backyard. What can I say, maybe it was the alcohol.

Being a child of an expat allowed me to travel the world and it also allowed me to see a different side of people than you normally get a chance to see. A certain kind of person will take matters into their own hands and move out of their home town; its another type of person who will take those matters to another country. Expats are a different breed and it becomes evident when they celebrate their free time.

There was no school here in Holland on Monday (Whit Monday) and Mo (my roommate) and I decided to invite the staff of the school over for a margarita party on Sunday night. We supply the ritas, the guests supply the food.

Sidebar - why is it that the Dutch don't have margarita mix? I was just hoping to pour the tequila in and go but that just isn't the case. On the other hand, I now know how to make a rita from scratch.

Back to the party to celebrate the arrival of 'Aunt Rita'. The party got rolling early (7pm for the spouses that had to work the next day) and what a time to be had. The tequila was flowing, the blenders spinning the lime juice and ice into its frenzy, the din of the crowd as they chatted the sun towards dusk. What fun it was to have that a motley bunch of friends over to celebrate a fictional person that is in no way related to anyone.

I know what you are thinking - c'mon, its just like any other party that anyone would throw. Actually, no it isn't. The other expats out there can back me up on this one. There just is something about partying with other expats that is fun and a bit surreal. Its hard to describe exactly what it is like but the feel of having friends over when no one is within 4000 miles of home is something unique.

Try it sometime. Become an expat and try living in another culture. You may like it, you may not. One thing for sure, it certainly changes the way you feel at a party...

leading by example? cheating by adults

Ok, its time for a rant. I've been quiet for a LONG time now and the events of today have led me to this soap box that I now stand upon. I am disturbed with my peers.

As teachers we are role models by defintion and there are a great deal many teachers who really do a disservice to the profession with the stupid stuff they do. Today I was a witness to the actions of a peer of mine that makes me shake my head and hope that a child of mine will never see a role model like this.

I am a coach at my school. I coach volleyball in the fall and co-ed softball in the spring. The last two days have been filled with 5 games for my boys and girls as they played through the season ending tournament. Friday was a good day for us, the kids were loose, the bats were dominant and the defense was good. Our first game saw us winning 14-2. I know it sounds like the score was kinda high but my kids were just hitting base hit after base hit. Also, the rules of our league require that if you score 8 runs in a half an inning, you switch to defense (regardless of # of outs).

Our next game was a loss and my kids were determined to come back with a win. Once again we had an excellent game and scored 18 runs to their 2. Nothing personal but their kids were horrible at defense and couldn't get us out. Some days...

So today we meant the same team in the quarterfinals. I know that the coach wanted to get back (he even said so) for the lop-sided loss from the previous day. A win for his team put him in the final while the loser would go on to the consolation game. And here is where it gets ugly and we see the all-too-familiar instance of a grown-up doing something for their kid when they should let the kid stand on their own.

We were up 6-3 in the bottom of the second. After some fielding errors, they had the bases loaded with 2 outs. According to their line-up, their weakest hitter was due up to bat. I wasn't following the game close enough and didn't notice that the wrong batter came up. The scorekeeper was clueless and didn't figure out what was wrong either (and not keeping an accurate sheet to begin with). The coach sends up a different hitter (not telling anyone) and this person hits a double, scoring two runs to make it 6-5. We get the next batter out and end the inning.

We come up next and put up the goose egg, still 6-5 (we are visiting team and batting in the top of the inning). Then the same player that finished the previous inning comes up to bat again. After he hits the first pitch and gets on base, I protest.

"This is the same kid that just finished the last inning. He can't be up twice in a row!"
Other coach, "Sorry, I made a mistake in my batting order. He went up to bat when she should have gone so I didn't want him batting twice so I just switched them in the order."
"You can't just switch your batting order. That's illegal."
"It was just a mistake. Sorry. Its not like we got anything out of it."
"You scored two runs, how can you say that?"
"Well, what can I say. I'm sorry."
Umpire, "Well, let's play ball!"

WTF!!!!

I argued for a while but to no avail. The ump didn't say anything because as he would say later, he was waiting for the scorekeeper to say something. The clueless gentleman didn't know what to say, so he said nothing. Score two runs for the opposition. We would later go on to lose the game 8-7 and not advance to the championship game.


My kids were denied the chance to play in the championship game because the coach from the other school didn't stand up for good sportsmanship and either (a) admit his mistake and take the runs off the board or (b) not pull the switch in the first place. In the previous day when my players made mistakes, I took runs off the scoreboard because of the honesty that I have and pointed the mistakes so that we would play in fairness. I was a good sportsman and showed my kids what we do when we are wrong. We admit the wrong and lose the benefit that we achieved from that.

But this guy wanted revenge. I heard him talking with his players as I was standing at the 3rd base coach position and he wanted to get us and get us good. I quote, "I want this bad. I want this for what happened yesterday." Is it my fault that his kids sucked yesterday and couldn't catch a fly ball to share their collective asses? I even took away runs! It could have been worse!

This team would go on to win the championship game. My team would go on to win the consolation game. Its no consolation, that's for sure.

What really irks me is that this guy is a member of my profession! Ya know, a profession where we are supposed to teach by example, play fair, and make our kids dig deep to win or lose on their own. He and his kids know that they won by cheating. Is this a lesson we want kids to learn? Too late, they already have.

I feel as though their is a bright spot out of this and it comes from within me. I went back to my team and showed them how to be gracious losers. I didn't involve them in the whole debate and I let them feel the pain of losing; they know nothing of the controversy. I didn't want them to be bitter from the loss and bitter towards a coach/teacher. I was the good sportsman. I taught the right lesson even though it burns me up beyond all belief. My kids should have had the chance to play to be champions.

And they are.

In my heart I know they are champions.

class favorite

I was doing some work with my kids today and we were looking at various pictures online of some stuff going on in the universe. My kids thought this one was pretty cool.

nice hat

Here's one way to say something about the amount of construction in a city... In this case, the Scots are speaking their mind.

motivation

So after a long hiatus, I come to report to you, my faithful reader, that I am lacking the motivation to write right now. Go figure, its been a couple of weeks since I have blogged and now I am writing to say that I am unmotivated to blog - like you haven't been able to tell...

I'll be back when I am up to it again. Until then, I'll try to add pictures up on a somewhat more frequent basis. A 'moment of zen' or something like that.

Back soon,

X

Here's one way of looking at it...

And yet here's the other.