As any man who has made it through puberty can attest to, there are certain times when your nether-regions need adjusting because things just aren't hangin' right.
Last night I was in my boss' garage, working on putting new saddlebags on my motorcycle. It was a nice evening, the sun was setting, the breeze was blowing gently, and my "boys" needed to be shuffled around so that they could enjoy the experience.
In the process of my adjusting, the school counselor (aka the boss' wife) comes out to put her trash in the bin, which is right in front of her garage. The same garage that I am working in, the same garage that has the door wide open as so I can enjoy the evening, the same garage that I am adjusting myself in.
So there I am, balls in my right hand, a shit-eating grin on my face, and my boss' wife spinning around to avoid the sight that she has just seen. She covers her eyes and tries to think of something whitty to say as a cover.
"Ohhh! You surprised me! I thought you were someone breaking into the garage and trying to steal your motorcycle!"
Yup, that's what most people do when they are trying to steal a motorcycle - they grab their balls.
I merely pulled my hand out of my pants, put it down into the pocket and pulled out the ratchet that was in my pocket. I calmly turned to the embarrased wife and said, "Nah, just looking for my wrench."
Life goes on.
My balls are fine.
My boss' wife appears to be ok and not permanently scarred.
The saddlebags aren't on my bike yet but I'll get them on this weekend.
And you can't make shit like this up.
About Me
- Expat Nomad
- Hardest question to answer? "Where are you from?" I've had problems finding a place to settle down and calling a place home. There's just something about going new places, meeting new people, experiencing new cultures. Maybe one of these days I'll stumble into a permanent place to hang my hat. Until then, I am a wanderin' fool.
4 comments:
"Nah, just looking for my wrench."
LOL!!!!!
Chalk this "caught in the act" experience" up to one of life's embarrassing moments!
Balls are funny things: they're so very, very important ("tener cajones" is a MUST for viril men) yet sometimes, I gather, finding a private place to adjust the "saddlebags" can be quite difficult! :-)
-slim
My favorite line of the whole thing - Yup, that's what most people do when they are trying to steal a motorcycle - they grab their balls.
I don't know whether to laugh or to cry. This invites comment in so many different ways...I'll play safe and say, "A delicate situation to say the least."
Thanks for not putting me through unbelieveable strain and stress with unkind remarks! ;)
But hey, if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?
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